school jokes : If you are looking for school jokes or teacher and student jokes. So we have 30+ school jokes in english. That mind blowing latest teacher and student jokes. You tell them your friends. Can share in WhatsApp status, FB story ect.
school jokes in english
Teacher: If I lay one egg here and another there, how many eggs will there be?
Fred: None!
Fred (surprised): Why not? Because you cant lay eggs!
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Jimmy: Would you punish me for some thing i didn’t do?
Teacher: no, of course not.
Jimmy: good, because i didn’t do my homework.
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Teacher: Name two days of the week that start with “t”.
Pupil: Today and Tomorrow.
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What is the difference between a school teacher and a train?
The teacher says spit your gum out and the train says ‘chew chew chew’.
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The teacher : “Why are you in the floor?”
Danny : “Because you said to do this Math problem without Tables.”
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Teacher: Why are you late?
Ramu: Because of the sign.
Teacher: What sign?
Ramu: The one that says, “School Ahead, Go Slow.”
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Teacher: What makes you see?
Bobyjack: My eyes, my nose and my ears.
Teacher: True for the eyes but why for your ears and nose?
Bobyjack: Its to hold my glasses!
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Teacher: If you eat fish?
Student: Its good for my eyes.
Teacher: If you don’t eat fish?
Student: Its good for the fish!
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Father: “Let me see your report card.”
Son: “My friend just borrowed it. He wants to scare his parents.”
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Teacher: What is the chemical formula for water?
Ramu: “HIJKLMNO”!!
Teacher: What are you talking about?
Ramu: Yesterday you said its H to O!
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school jokes in english
Maths teacher: “If you have 12 chocolates and you give 5 to Priya, 3 to Sonia and 2 to Penny then what will you get?”
“3 new Girlfriends!”
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Teacher: “Now class, whatever I ask, I want you to all answer at once. How much is six plus four?”
Class: “At once!”
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Teacher: whoever answers my next question, can go home.
One boy throws his bag out the window.
Teacher: who just threw that?!
Boy: Me! I’m going home now.
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Teacher: “I killed a person, tell me this sentence in future tense.”
Student: “In future tense, You will go to jail.”
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Teacher: What do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?
Student: A teacher!
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Did anyone ever notice that “STUDYING”
is a mixture of STUDY and DYING?
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Teacher: “You know you can’t sleep in my class.”
Boy: “I know. But maybe if you were just a little quieter, I could.”
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Teacher: “How can you prove the earth is round?”
Boy: “I can’t. Besides, I never said it was.”
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Teacher: “Why are you late?”
Boy: “Because of a sign down the road.” T
Teacher: “What does a sign have to do with your being late?”
Boy: “The sign said, ‘School Ahead, Go Slow!’”
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Teacher: Students draw a picture of bacteria.
Student: Here it is Mam!
Teacher: Where? It Is Blank.
Student: you told that bacteria cannot be seen with naked eye!
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school jokes in english
Teacher: “Ramu, you talk a lot !”
Ramu: “Its a family tradition”.
Teacher: “What do you mean?”
Ramu: “Sir, my grandpa was a street hawker, my father is a teacher”.
Teacher: “What about your mother?”
Ramu: “Shes a woman”.
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Father: Son this time, you have to score 90% marks in your exams.
Son: No father Ill score 100% marks.
Father: Why are you kidding?
Son: Who started?
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Teacher: Did your father help you with your homework?
Student: No, he did it all by himself.
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TEACHER : What is further away, Australia or the Moon?
Pupil : Australia, you can see the Moon at night.
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Teacher: Billy, name two pronouns.
Billy: Who, me?
Teacher: Very good!
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Teacher: “You missed school yesterday, didn’t you?”
Boy: “Not a bit!”
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Teacher: Tomorrow there will be a lecture on Sun. Everyone must attend it.
Mary: No madam! I will not be able to attend it.
Teacher: Why?
Mary: My mother will not allow me to go so far!
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Teacher: Ramu, your composition on “My Dog” is exactly the same as your brothers. Did you copy his?
Ramu: No, teacher, its the same dog!
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Teacher: “Which is more important to us, the sun or the moon?”
Ramu: “The moon”.
Teacher: “Why?”
Ramu: “The moon gives us light at night when we need it but the sun gives us light only in the day time when we don’t need it”.
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